The 70:30 rule
How to apply the 70:30 rule to your life
There's a rule I like to keep in mind when facing any kind of change, or a challenge in life in general. It's called the 70:30 rule, and it says that, no matter what, 30% of life is going to be hard. (Of course, this rule applies to us privileged few who do not live in poverty or a war-torn country).
Things are going to go wrong.
And you're going to experience some pretty awful thoughts, feelings, or events. This is just the way life is. Not everything goes right - and so we can expect things to go wrong. Yes - I said it, expect things to go wrong!
Now for those perfectionists of us out there - yes, me, I'm pointing at me, and maybe at you, whilst this might "intellectually" makes sense, it's really not supposed to be that way. Like me, you may resist the idea. Can't we do our best to try and make things go 100% right?
Unfortunately (or fortunately) not.
Such is life. Things turn out differently from what we expected, and they inevitably will. Now if we can learn to accept this fact, and expect this fact - planning for, and living through, change becomes a lot less stressful. When things happen that weren't supposed to, or weren't expected, or someone doesn’t do what they said they're going to do - then this gets put in the 30% bucket. There it is - drop it in!
No resistance, or fighting, or crying over the proverbial spilt milk.
Acceptance of the 30% frees us up to refocus on the 70%…
… and on all the things that are going right. Whilst being privileged to live in a free, non-war-torn/ poverty-stricken society, we can put our resources into those things which we can control - directly (including our responses to the things that go wrong). And we can develop gratitude for the other 70% of things that are going right - and not take it for granted when they do.
This puts you in a better position to take advantage of the opportunities that lie in change, and emerge a stronger, more resilient person afterwards.
---
Click here for emotional strategies when things go wrong, as they inevitably will, 30% of the time.
Click here for gratitude exercises you can use to appreciate your life more.
---
