How to manage a big life change effectively

A practical process for undergoing any significant life change

Change is how we grow, and yet we have a natural resistance to it. By letting go of that resistance, and flowing with it, we are able to change, and grow, and transform into an improved version of ourselves.

“Water does not resist. Water flows. When you plunge your hand into it, all you feel is a caress. Water is not a solid wall, it will not stop you. But water always goes where it wants to go, and nothing in the end can stand against it. Water is patient. Dripping water wears away a stone… Remember you are half water. If you can't go through an obstacle, go around it. Water does.” - Margaret Atwood

Steps to work through when confronting change:

Talk about it with someone you trust - sometimes just getting it out is enough for things to become clearer in your mind.
Understand your values - who you are as a person and how you want to act in the world. What has motivated this change? Hold this clearly in your mind - every change is an opportunity to live more aligned with your values.
Set a timeframe, say 3 months, or 6 months, or one year from now (whichever feels comfortable or relevant for you) -

Think about where you'll be, looking back
Imagine everything has worked out
Write down what you did, what obstacles came up, and how you responded to them.

Then set goals that draw a line from where you are now, to where you want to be (see this article about setting goals aligned with your values)
Anticipate challenges: think about all the things that might go wrong, what might cause you to have difficult thoughts and emotions, and what you have learned about yourself in the past. Identify those tangible and intangible resources that you can lean on when the going gets tough, and how you plan to manage these challenges. These will be invaluable in your plan for change:
- Tangible = financial and physical
- Intangible = social, psychological, spiritual (what else can you think of?)
Be kind to yourself: change is never easy, and you want to make sure you are friends with yourself as you move forward. This will increase the likelihood that you will successfully transition. So be sure to include enjoyable things in the form of routines and rituals that allow your mind and body to recharge and refuel.
Enjoy the process! This is the plan. Remember,